Not In The Mood? Here’s Why…
February is supposed to be the month of love and romance, but does your sex drive feel like a sinking ship?
Studies suggest that 34% of women and 15% of men experience a decrease in sexual interest often or most of the time.
Losing your libido is a new age problem triggered by both mental and physical factors. In this day and age the number of physical and mental stressors in our life far exceeds what our ancestors ever experienced.
We are constantly connected to our devices.
We work longer hours than past generations.
We commute farther and sit in more traffic.
We cart multiple kids around to various activities.
We have more commitments and responsibilities.
We eat processed foods, drink less water and move less.
We are exposed to thousands of toxins every day that alter our hormones.
And the list goes on…
All of this happens at the expense of our energy, health, and our sex life.
Being “in the mood” requires being in a mental space that allows the lust to flow, but it also needs assistance from your hormones.
Hormones are what drive our sexual desires. Testosterone is the most influential one in both men and women, but estrogen, progesterone and even oxytocin (the “love” hormone) all play a role in arousal. These hormones work together to start the engine and steer your sex drive.
Beyond the distractions and stress of everyday life, there is actually something more going on behind the scenes that causes a loss of libido – Pregnenolone Steal.
Misfiring hormones contribute to approximately 70% of low sex drive.
When we are under constant stress our body is continuously releasing cortisol hormone in response. Eventually the demand for cortisol becomes so great, or so chronic, that the body can no longer keep up with the demand.
Over time as cortisol becomes dysregulated, the body starts stealing resources, such as the hormone pregnenolone, in order to produce cortisol. The loss of these resources leaves our storage for testosterone, estrogen and progesterone dry.
In this week’s video and blog I show you what happens during pregnenolone steal, how it sucks your sexual desire dry and what you can do to reverse it.
In addition to diminishing testosterone, estrogen and progesterone resources, a high output of cortisol also suppresses our love hormone oxytocin.
Oxytocin is known as the love hormone that is released during childbirth (to make you forget all the pain you just went through, LOL), with orgasm, while playing, laughing, hugging and giving.
A low libido life is not without hope, though!
There is certainly hope for those feeling hopeless about their sex drive. It is possible to get it back, no matter how long it’s been gone for or how old you are.
To get your vavavoom back you just have to reduce the demand for cortisol and turn up the volume for oxytocin.
How can you do that, you might ask? Here’s how…
Hug, laugh and play more!
These actions instantly boost your oxytocin levels. Even doing something as simple as looking deeply into someone’s eyes, smiling or expressing gratitude can create a surge in oxytocin levels. Oxytocin also helps to lower cortisol levels naturally, too!
Take time to meditate, do deep breathing or get upside down.
All of these activities instantly turn off the valve for cortisol, take you out of “fight or flight” mode and instantly relieve stress. Even just a few minutes once or twice a day can have a huge impact!
To reduce even more chronic stress and cortisol output, you can also:
- Eat an anti-inflammatory diet free of gluten, dairy, sugar and soy
- Get to sleep by 10pm most nights of the week
- Turn down your exercise intensity and/or add in a weekly yoga class
To better understand your cortisol and hormone balance as it relates to your sex drive, you can also do a simple urine test in the comfort of your own home.
Testing your cortisol and sex hormones gives you insights on how to strategically balance your body using diet, sleep, exercise, stress reducing tools and supplements.
However, hormone tests are not all created equal. To truly evaluate cortisol balance you need to be able to see the rhythm of your cortisol throughout the day. A urine or saliva based test is best as they allow you to take several different samples during the day to see the rhythm and flow versus a blood test that only shows one snapshot in time.
Understanding the health of your cortisol balance will assist you in getting your groove back!
